Just Keep Winning
Yesterday afternoon, I was catching up on my blog reading with one hand while holding my sleeping newborn in the other when I came across Jon Acuff's most recent post, titled "Dear person going to a job you don’t love on Monday." He gets an A+ for attention grabbing titles.
I'm thankful to him because his post inspired me to stop procrastinating and write. Before starting my blog, I had mentally told myself that I would spend time on Sunday afternoons writing so I would have something to post at least once a week. But I haven't been doing that. It doesn't seen difficult, so why am I failing?
It could be due to lack of motivation, inspiration, time, accountability, the fact I have a 5 week old...the list goes on. Or, it could be due to the simple fact that I didn't write it down, I didn't tell anyone or I didn't put it in my calendar.
If I want to figure out this HUGE thing called my life, then I have to start small. I can't expect to wake up one morning with all the answers when I haven't spent time asking the right questions.
In his post, Jon talks about the concept of microscopic goals. While this concept is simple it is a revolutionary for me. I have a tendency to want to have everything planned, to understand the big picture before beginning (that's FEAR talking again), but on my journey of self-discovery that's impossible. I don't know what's going to happen, what the journey is going to look like or where it will end up. That's exhilarating and terrifying all at once.
So, I'm going to start today with the smallest achievable goal I can think of (write every Sunday afternoon). My goal is not to "figure my life out" because that's overwhelming and self-defeating. I've put my small goal in my calendar and I'm telling you so you can hold me accountable. It's critical that I learn to honor myself through this small act. If I can't keep commitments to myself, then my self-respect is nonexistent. By embarking on this journey of self-discovery, I have to give attention to the parts of myself that I've silenced and honor who I was made to be. It starts small and starts now.